» Heaven - Jason Evans | Flashes of Speculation

Love, love, love.

Warm undulation. Heaven’s breath in wetness and soup. So much pleasure. Rolling and diving. Caressing and devouring. Pulsing through the minutes.

White on white. Swimming in darkness. White on white on white.

Heaven.

* * * *
“Oh, Christ.”

“Yeah, tell me about it.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

The heavier man grimaced.

“Nope. If I was, I wouldn’t be standing here looking at it.”

“Has Chuckles been by yet?”

“You better quit that shit! You know he hates that.”

“Whatever. All coroners are freaks. It’s not my fault they sniff way too much formaldehyde.”

The guy laughed. “Good one, man.”

“We’ve got to get him laid or something.”

“Enough! My God, I don’t need that image in my head!”

“Wait. You’re about to be elbow deep in this shit, and you’re worried about seeing Chuckles in the sack? Priorities, man, priorities.”

“My priorities are just fine. Now, you got a good grip on the leg? Don’t slip!”

The hand sank in. “Got it. At least I think.”

“Why do I think we’re going to regret trying to pick this thing up?” he muttered.

“Hey, what do you think it’s like to be a maggot?”

The guy looked down at the swarms and their macabre ballet.

“Well, probably pretty damn wonderful right about now,” he said. “Like heaven.”

Jason Evans is the twilight keeper at The Clarity of Night.

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[...] And Jason Evans has added his pen to the list of contributing writers at Flashes of Speculation with his piece entitled Heaven. Interesting perspective, to say the least. Related Articles: [...]

1 Heaven at Writer’s Blog August 16, 2006 7:19 am

That was great. I didn’t see that last twist coming at all.

2 Stephanie Vann August 16, 2006 9:36 am

Great use of dialogue to reach a natural conclusion with a bang. Very sneaky beginning, too.

3 Flood August 16, 2006 11:11 am

Snappy dialogue in a cool story.

4 hana August 16, 2006 1:24 pm

in heaven, everything is fiiii-ne.

very nice, jason!! :)

5 anne frasier August 16, 2006 3:50 pm

Stephanie, thanks so much! I wanted people to think “huh?” at the beginning, then “oh dear” at the end. It’s not everyday you get to write from the perspective of a maggot.

Flood, I was afraid folks might not tie it together, but I think there’s enough to connect the dots.

Hana, thank you! I liked the irreverence of these guys.

Anne, a visceral view of heaven. Glad you liked it! :D

6 jason evans August 16, 2006 4:42 pm

Outstanding. Taking an idea like heaven and thinking about it from another viewpoint is challenging for most of us. Great job.

7 Brandon August 16, 2006 9:09 pm

I love the beginning. White on white on white , such a great line. And the twist at the end, I never saw coming. Great work.

8 Rebecca August 16, 2006 9:14 pm

Brandon, thank you for the kind words! I think I got a little too much enjoyment out of writing it. :) Oh the possibilities….

Rebecca, it was too fun sticking those seemingly unrelated bits together. Glad you liked it!!

9 jason evans August 16, 2006 9:25 pm

Nice job Jason,

Nice job of description and even deception. I am not sure how anyone could have seen it going there. Thanks,

10 Rob Rapoza August 16, 2006 9:28 pm

Nicely done.

11 Stephen Blackmoore August 16, 2006 9:48 pm

For a second there I thought you were trying out romance for a change. I should have known better. Nice job!

12 Jaye Wells August 16, 2006 10:58 pm

Jason, I believe this is the most commented story to date. Congrats! I also think that you certainly pushed the boundary of horror (since I can’t really classify it under any other category). Or maybe it’s more a case of toeing the line. :)

13 Jim August 17, 2006 8:54 am

Jason, another great example of dialog carrying the storyline. Great descripton of off stage character (coroner). Great ending.

14 Robert Ball August 17, 2006 10:14 am

You’ve got a lot packed into just a few words. I gotta say I loved this one. Just icky enough. Good job, Twilight Keeper.

15 Joni August 17, 2006 4:45 pm

Whoa, nice departure!

16 Jay August 17, 2006 9:57 pm

BD, the ones you don’t see coming are the best!——Stephen, thanks for the kind words!——Jaye, do I hear a challenge in there? Do I hear Jason-Evans-couldn’t-write-romance-if-St.-Valentine-slapped-him-upside-the-head? Okay, we’ll see about that. ;)——Jim, thanks! I kind of see it as horror meets mystery meets humor.——Robert, I’ve been experimenting with just how much backstory can be delivered in a few words of dialog.——Joni, glad you like it, and weren’t too creeped out!——Jay, hehe. :D

17 jason evans August 18, 2006 12:32 pm

Oh, great job! The beginning almost erotic, but with a question (soup?) and then a very well executed but apparently unrelated piece of dialog, and finally the connection at the very end. You handed out the information so carefully, it was impossible to guess where you were going – but the dialog was so natural that I didn’t feel you were withholding information.

Very, very well done!

18 Fran Piper August 18, 2006 3:52 pm

Fran, haha! You got it precisely. I was going for an erotic-type feel at the beginning and knew “soup” would be a clinker.

This piece was really fun to do. :D

19 jason evans August 19, 2006 12:24 am

Brilliant work – love it!

20 Jools August 20, 2006 5:57 am

Everything IS relative. Heaven for some…would be hell for others.

Loved the back and forth conversation…very natural. Fresh dialogue.

And the beginning was soooooo stimulating…just glad I didn’t know that I was getting breathless over maggots.

Entertaining…as always, Jason.

K. Lawson Gilbert

21 K. Lawson Gilbert August 20, 2006 8:14 pm

This is classic, sly, sharp. Very, very well done. Really enjoyed it.

Like someone already mentioned here, the opening is perfect, perfectly imagined – a viewpoint beautifully established. I say, I vote for the opening, more than anything else.

This, is writing.

22 Prashanth August 21, 2006 7:58 am

Flashes of Speculation

Heaven - Jason Evans

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